Things You Should Know. (About me, I mean. There are a lot of other things you should know in general, obviously. About elephant’s feet, and how hair colour is relevant to anesthetic. But this page is about me. Google the other things later)

I’m very nosy and want to know all sorts of things about people I develop parasocial relationships with, beyond the ordinary somnambulistic biographical stuff. So here are some things about me that might be vaguely interesting.

I used to write when I was very young. I saw myself as a creative, and a writer, and then life and my brain and those kind of annoying things happened and I was too scared of being rejected or judged for decades before I went ‘fuck it, lets go.’ At this stage I’ve had two novels published, lots of short stories and have been shortlisted or runner up in numerous competitions.

I love to read horror stories, but can’t watch horror movies. Would rather gnaw my own arms off and shove them in my ears than watch a horror movie, actually, but I want to be constantly terrified by horrific, preferably paranormal, novels. Straight off the top of my head some of my favourites are Where the Chills Waits, Stolen Tongues, The Exorcist’s House and Pet Semetary. Let me know if you have any favourites I should read.

So far I have written fantasy, urban fantasy, sci-fi and one horror short story but my heart mainly lies in comic urban fantasy. I’m currently working on a contemporary women’s fiction manuscript but I keep wanting to make people jump into time-slip portals or hex the antagonist so its hard going. People say that my writing reminds them of Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett which is enormously complimentary of course, but I’m more overtly feminist I think, and my stories tend to be very very Australian.

I really hate generative AI and can detect within two seconds whether someone is using it in their writing, either in stories, making social media posts or blogs.

I am as leftie pinko liberal woke snowflake as they come but I will absolutely make fun of woke-ism in my writing because fuck me we can be painfully, earnestly ridiculous with our save-the-trans-first-nations-whales dialogue.

This year I’m trying to get rejected as much as possible in all areas of life (not just writing because I’m used to that) so that I become Very Brave and Resilient. So if you can think of something that I could ask /apply /try out for let me know because I’m running out of ideas and it’s only January (and getting rejected by my Amex credit limit can only count once a month I’ve decided).

I walk an entirely impossible to balance on, fine line, between being fiercely anti-capitalist, burn it all down, spit on the bootlickers and overthrow everything, and a desire to travel business class and buy $5000 handbags and have people open doors for me because Im just that fabulous.

I’ve always thought that I want to live a quiet life with cats and not too many people around me and maybe write by the ocean all day in the tropics but after 1 week of lockdown during covid I elected to go straight back to work because I missed people.

The maxim ‘Know Thyself’ is not one I’m familiar with, as you may have worked out.